*Patrick Bourque (September 27, 1977- September 25, 2007)*
For those who don't know, Patrick Bourque was the bassist for Canadian alt/country band, Emerson Drive. He joined the band in 2002, and left the band in August 2007, on short notice. Everyone noticed the absence when he didn't appear on The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson with the rest of the band. I last saw him on July 16, 2007, when Emerson Drive played at one of KISS Country's $5 concerts in the park... that was the strangest show I have ever attended. It just wasn't right, something wasn't right. The vibe was off, and the vibe was awkward. My mother, and my friend Michelle can totally vouch for that. Dale, the keyboard player, wasn't there (he had family business to attend to back home), and they just didn't mesh well. But that wasn't the only issue regarding that show. Patrick wasn't happy. And it showed. (They all appeared to have forced smiles and forced enthusiasm.) But my main focus, and main concern was Patrick. I've been to over a dozen Emerson Drive shows, and Patrick was ALWAYS happy... or at least he always appeared to be. He had THE biggest smile I have ever seen. He was, without a doubt, one of the happiest people I have ever met. Always full of smiles. Always. I still wonder if that was just an act... but normally, I can spot fake, almost immediately. Anyway, none of us knew what was going on, but we knew something was going on... and we didn't like that feeling.
I love a lot of bands. A loooooot of bands. I love them all differently, of course. I cannot explain the love I have for Emerson Drive. They're special. We've had fun with them... and by we, I mean my Mother and I... and my friend Michelle. We've had great times with that band, we goofed around with them... it was just... special. They knew who we were, they might not have known our names (or much less remembered our names), but they knew who we were, and made it known that they did. They would wave and say "Hi!" during sound checks, point and wave during their shows... goofed off to our cameras... to the point where people would ask us, "OMG! Are you friends with them?" We'd answer, "Yep!" Even though we weren't... but they made us feel like we were... well, back when things were great and normal...
Anyway, they've always been nice to me. Patrick was always nice to me, even though he knew that I thought he was the biggest perv ever. Which he was... well, maybe not the biggest perv ever, but he was a perv. haha! I used to roll my eyes at him, every time he gave the "pervy eyes and pervy look" and he would always just laugh. I referred to him as "pervy spice" (his Spice Girls name... haha!) We just always had a lot of fun with him.
Where am I going with this? I have no friggin' clue... I'm just rambling. I have a lot of things to talk about, remember, and reflect on... and they're all spinning around in my head like a blender.
If memory serves me correctly, I believe they announced his death on the 26th of September? I remember everything about that night. I had just come home from a night class, in fact, it was right around this time (9pm) when I found out about his passing. I found out on MySpace... someone had posted a bulletin, and I thought they were just messing around, passing gossip. Until I read the official statement on their web page. My heart sank. I was stunned beyond belief. It didn't seem real. I wanted to cry but nothing came out. I lost all feeling. I had no feeling for at least a week or two. I was confused... no, confused would be an understatement. I just didn't know, and I still don't know...
SO many questions, and so little answers. Even to this DAY. I have no clue why he did it, how it happened (not the exact details, of course)... it was just one big ball of confusion. Angry confusion. It took a while for the band to say anything... and if they said anything, they didn't say much. I don't like the way they handled that, but who am I to judge? I'm not the one who lost a "brother". I do know, however, that Patrick left to go produce or make music for some Canadian TV show (supposedly), but had changed his mind, and wanted back in the band. They told him to take some time off, think about things, and get back with them in a few months. I didn't find that out until after he died, and the first thing I thought of was Def Leppard/Steve Clark, and that angered me to no end, because we all know how that ended. It's been five years, and I'm less angry and less hurt, but still. They waited until they were at the 'Grand Ole Opry' (televised) to even announce that it was a suicide... THAT angered me the most. 1) They couldn't have said that sooner? 2) They had to wait until they were on TV, when nobody was expecting that? 3) Their BIGGEST and only #1 hit in the U.S., "Moments" (the song they were still promoting when he died) was about a man who was contemplating suicide, who ultimately chose not to do it. He played that song night after night... DID HE NOT LISTEN TO IT??? It absolutely baffles me. That song was right there... why didn't that save him? I know they were just as shocked as all of us, and were grieving... but at that time, they appeared to be a tad nonchalant about his death. But it was obvious that they were hurting... I think Mike was hurting the most. It just felt like they had disconnected themselves from their fans, when everyone should have banded together in support. But they're only human... and everyone handles things differently... yes, I've gained new perspective over the years.
It hasn't been the same since the death of Patrick Bourque... at least in my eyes. (I mean, they're practically the Beatles up in Canada, but there's still an obvious, empty space.) Everything was just strange, and sad. They came around to these parts, a few months after Pat's passing, but I refused to go see them. It was too soon. I totally regret that, I should've went and seen them. My friend and I saw them a few year back in San Jose, in February 2009, I believe? It was great seeing them again, they remembered who I was... and put on a great show, as always. But it wasn't the same. Seeing someone else on bass was hard to take. I broke down mid-concert.
My last encounter with the Bourquester might've been an awkward one, but that's the not one I choose to remember as my last. My LAST real encounter with Sir Bourque, was at the "ED Love Fest 2007" (I made up that name for sh*ts and giggles, so don't get any ideas... there was no 'loving' going on haha!)... we stayed at the same hotel as them, and our room was next door to Patrick and David's... that alone was epic. Mike initiating hang-outs with us/taking pictures in front of our room was ALSO epic... but the Bourque moment happened after the concert. Meet-and-greet, full of smiles, very talkative... he told us that we were staying in the room next to theirs, and that David saw us walk by the window a few times, while he was in his underwear. BAM! hahaha! Classic Bourque.
I miss Patrick. Yes, he might've been a "perv", but dammit, he was our perv!!!
This song will forever make me weep.
Patrick Bourque was a good man.
